My strength came from....

Wow its been 7 years... oh it must be 7 years now that I was doing what all new mothers do now... on goggle typing in that my daughter was hearing impaired and I came across a website with bulletin boards... I don't' remember exactly how we met but there was a mom there that had a daughter the same age as my daughter and we started talking.

I remember feeling like I was all alone, scared, afraid of what our future would bring and so afraid of the unknown. This friend and I have never met but I feel like she is my strength. I never talked to her in real time. We never spoke on the phone but she was there for me when I needed her. At no matter what time of day I was able to send her an email... she was there to listen to me... she never judged me for my fears... she never told me how to feel and never told me how to react to anything... she reminded me all the time that I needed to stay strong and she gave me the ability to vent when I needed to so the rest of the day I could stay strong.

Over the past couple of years we haven't talked as much... I'm not sure why.. maybe she gave me so much support that I felt strong enough to stand on my own but boy do I miss her at times. I just don't want to bother her all the time. I think about her all the time and how much I would just love to send her an email and ask her what I should do but I felt there is never any good news in my emails so maybe I'm bothering her... maybe I'm depressing her... I drafted so many emails but I couldn't figure out how to just say Hi... someone asks me how things are I have a tendency to tell them and since I'm now into my 4th cancer scare and waiting to find out I don't want to say nothing again but bad news.

Well I was shocked tonight to get an Email from her after I sent her a joke email...

She needed the laugh as shes going through some really serious medical scares herself... for a few months now all I've been thinking about is myself when a friend of mine is going through this too... please understand my friend that even though I haven't been emailing I'm still here for you... I want to listen.. I want to tell you your in my thoughts and I want to thank you for being there for me for so many years... if it wasn't for you I would never have turned into the Mother Warrior I am today... my strength comes from you... your words were there for me when I needed them and I'm here for you when you need me.... anytime day or night.

Hugs and Kisses
Me